Defining a relationship can often be a daunting task. The question “What are we?” encapsulates the uncertainty and desire for clarity that many feel when navigating the complexities of romantic involvement.
This article explores 50 ways to ask someone “What are we?”, providing a variety of approaches that can suit different personalities and relationship dynamics. Each response is discussed in detail, offering insight into when and how to use it effectively.
By the end of this article, you’ll have a comprehensive toolkit to help you define your relationship with clarity and confidence.
List Of Ways to Ask Someone “What Are We?”
- Where do you see our relationship going?
- How do you define what we have?
- What do you think our status is?
- Are we on the same page about our relationship?
- How would you describe our relationship to others?
- What are your thoughts about our future together?
- Are we exclusive?
- How do you feel about where we stand?
- What do you want from this relationship?
- Do you see us as a couple?
- What are we to each other?
- Do you see a long-term future with me?
- How committed do you feel to our relationship?
- Are we more than just friends?
- What’s your take on what we have?
- Do you consider us to be in a relationship?
- What kind of relationship do you think we have?
- How do you view our connection?
- What do you expect from us?
- Are you looking for something serious with me?
- Where do you see us in a few months?
- How do you feel about labeling our relationship?
- Do you want to be exclusive with me?
- How would you define our relationship?
- Are we in a relationship?
- What does this relationship mean to you?
- Do you see me as your partner?
- How serious are you about us?
- Are we just dating or something more?
- What do you call what we have?
- Are we boyfriend and girlfriend?
- How do you see our relationship developing?
- Do you think we’re in a committed relationship?
- How do you feel about making our relationship official?
- Do you want to take our relationship to the next level?
- Are we in a serious relationship?
- How do you feel about calling me your partner?
- Do you want to define what we have?
- Are you ready to label our relationship?
- How do you perceive our relationship?
- Are we in a monogamous relationship?
- What’s your idea of what we are?
- Do you consider us to be a serious couple?
- Are we in an exclusive relationship?
- How committed do you feel towards me?
- Are you ready to be in a relationship with me?
- What does our relationship mean to you?
- How do you view us together?
- Do you see me as more than just a friend?
- What’s your perspective on our relationship?
1. Where do you see our relationship going?
Asking, “Where do you see our relationship going?” is a straightforward way to seek clarity about the future. It implies that you are interested in long-term commitment and want to understand your partner’s vision.
Example:
Person 1: We’ve been spending a lot of time together, and I really enjoy it. Where do you see our relationship going?
Person 2: I feel the same way. I see us moving toward something more serious.
This question can open a meaningful dialogue about future plans and expectations.
2. How do you define what we have together as a relationship?
The question, “How do you define what we have together as a relationship?”, invites your partner to share their perspective on your bond. It’s a non-confrontational way to understand their view without putting them on the spot.
Example:
Person 1: I really like spending time with you. How do you define what we have together as a relationship?
Person 2: I see us as more than just friends. I think we’re in a romantic relationship.
This approach encourages open communication and helps align your understanding.
3. What do you think our status is in this relationship?
“What do you think our status is in this relationship?” is a direct yet gentle way to seek clarity. It implies you’re ready to discuss the nature of your relationship without making assumptions.
Example:
Person 1: We’ve been hanging out a lot lately. What do you think our status is in this relationship?
Person 2: I think we’re dating, but we haven’t made it official yet.
This question can help clear up any ambiguity and set the stage for defining your relationship.
4. Are we on the same page about our relationship as a couple?
Asking, “Are we on the same page about our relationship as a couple?”, addresses potential discrepancies in understanding. It’s a way to ensure mutual agreement about your relationship status.
Example:
Person 1: I feel like we’re really connecting. Are we on the same page about our relationship as a couple?
Person 2: Yes, I think we’re definitely a couple. I’m glad you brought this up.
This question helps confirm that you both share the same perspective on your relationship.
5. How would you describe our relationship to others when they ask about us?
The question, “How would you describe our relationship to others when they ask about us?”, provides insight into how your partner views your connection. It’s a subtle way to understand their perception without directly asking for a label.
Example:
Person 1: I was curious, how would you describe our relationship to others when they ask about us?
Person 2: I usually tell them we’re dating and getting to know each other better.
This approach can reveal how your partner talks about your relationship in social contexts.
6. What are your thoughts about our future together as a couple?
“What are your thoughts about our future together as a couple?” is a proactive way to discuss long-term goals and expectations. It shows that you’re thinking ahead and value your partner’s input.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking about us a lot. What are your thoughts about our future together as a couple?
Person 2: I see us continuing to grow closer and eventually moving in together.
This question helps align your visions for the future and can strengthen your bond.
7. Are we exclusive in our relationship?
The question, “Are we exclusive in our relationship?”, directly addresses the commitment level. It’s a clear way to establish boundaries and ensure you’re both on the same page.
Example:
Person 1: I really like you and want to know, are we exclusive in our relationship?
Person 2: Yes, I’m only seeing you. I feel we’re ready to be exclusive.
This question helps define the relationship and sets expectations for fidelity.
8. How do you feel about where we stand in our relationship?
“How do you feel about where we stand in our relationship?” invites your partner to share their feelings and thoughts. It’s an open-ended question that encourages honest communication.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been reflecting on us. How do you feel about where we stand in our relationship?
Person 2: I feel good about it. I think we’re moving in a positive direction.
This approach fosters a deeper conversation about your current status and future.
9. What do you want from this relationship as we move forward?
The question, “What do you want from this relationship as we move forward?”, seeks to understand your partner’s expectations and desires. It’s a way to align your goals and ensure you’re both working towards the same objectives.
Example:
Person 1: I’m really invested in us. What do you want from this relationship as we move forward?
Person 2: I want us to keep building on what we have and see where it takes us.
This question helps you both clarify your intentions and hopes for the relationship.
10. Do you see us as a couple moving forward?
“Do you see us as a couple moving forward?” is a straightforward way to ask about the future of your relationship. It seeks confirmation of your partner’s intentions and vision.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking a lot about us. Do you see us as a couple moving forward? Person 2: Yes, I definitely do. I want us to keep growing together.
This question helps solidify your understanding of your relationship’s trajectory.
11. What are we to each other at this point in our relationship?
“What are we to each other at this point in our relationship?” is a direct question that seeks a clear definition. It’s a way to eliminate any ambiguity and understand your partner’s view.
Example:
Person 1: We’ve come a long way together. What are we to each other at this point in our relationship?
Person 2: I see you as my partner, someone I care deeply about.
This approach helps define your relationship status and strengthen your connection.
12. Do you see a long-term future with me as your partner?
“Do you see a long-term future with me as your partner?” addresses long-term commitment and shared goals. It’s a way to understand if your partner envisions a future together.
Example:
Person 1: I really care about you. Do you see a long-term future with me as your partner?
Person 2: Yes, I do. I see us building a life together.
This question helps you both align your long-term expectations and plans.
13. How committed do you feel to our relationship and its future?
“How committed do you feel to our relationship and its future?” seeks to understand your partner’s level of commitment. It’s an important question to gauge their dedication.
Example:
Person 1: I’m fully committed to us. How committed do you feel to our relationship and its future?
Person 2: I’m very committed. I want us to have a strong and lasting relationship.
This question helps ensure you’re both equally invested in the relationship.
14. Are we more than just friends in your eyes?
“Are we more than just friends in your eyes?” is a straightforward way to clarify your relationship status. It helps determine if your partner sees you as more than a friend.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been wondering, are we more than just friends in your eyes?
Person 2: Absolutely, I see us as much more than friends. We’re definitely in a relationship.
This question helps clear up any confusion about your relationship status.
15. What’s your take on what we have together as a couple?
“What’s your take on what we have together as a couple?” invites your partner to share their perspective. It’s a way to understand their view of your relationship.
Example:
Person 1: I value your opinion. What’s your take on what we have together as a couple? Person 2: I think we have something special. I see us as a committed couple.
This approach encourages open dialogue and mutual understanding.
16. Do you consider us to be in a relationship now?
“Do you consider us to be in a relationship now?” is a direct question that seeks a clear answer. It helps confirm your current status and eliminate any ambiguity.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, do you consider us to be in a relationship now?
Person 2: Yes, I do. We’re definitely in a relationship.
This question provides clarity and confirms your relationship status.
17. What kind of relationship do you think we have right now?
“What kind of relationship do you think we have right now?” is an open-ended question that invites your partner to share their view. It’s a way to understand their perspective.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking, what kind of relationship do you think we have right now? Person 2: I see us as a couple who’s building something meaningful together.
This approach helps align your understanding of the relationship.
18. How do you view our connection and relationship together?
“How do you view our connection and relationship together?” seeks to understand your partner’s feelings and thoughts about your bond. It’s a way to deepen your understanding.
Example:
Person 1: I cherish our connection. How do you view our connection and relationship together?
Person 2: I feel the same way. I think we have a strong and growing relationship.
This question fosters open communication and mutual appreciation.
19. What do you expect from us as a couple in the future?
“What do you expect from us as a couple in the future?” is a proactive way to discuss future expectations. It helps align your goals and understand each other’s vision.
Example:
Person 1: I want to know your thoughts. What do you expect from us as a couple in the future?
Person 2: I expect us to keep growing closer and supporting each other.
This question helps you both set expectations and plan for the future.
20. Are you looking for something serious with me in this relationship?
“Are you looking for something serious with me in this relationship?” addresses the level of commitment your partner desires. It’s a way to ensure you’re on the same page.
Example:
Person 1: I’m looking for something serious. Are you looking for something serious with me in this relationship?
Person 2: Yes, I am. I want us to have a committed and serious relationship.
This question helps clarify your mutual commitment to the relationship.
21. Where do you see us in a few months from now in our relationship?
“Where do you see us in a few months from now in our relationship?” is a forward-looking question. It helps understand your partner’s vision for the near future.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking about our future. Where do you see us in a few months from now in our relationship?
Person 2: I see us getting even closer and possibly making more serious plans.
This question helps you both envision the near future and plan accordingly.
22. How do you feel about labeling our relationship and making it official?
“How do you feel about labeling our relationship and making it official?” seeks to understand your partner’s readiness to define the relationship. It’s a way to discuss taking the next step.
Example:
Person 1: I think we’re ready. How do you feel about labeling our relationship and making it official?
Person 2: I agree. I think it’s time we made it official.
This question helps move your relationship towards official status.
23. Do you want to be exclusive with me in this relationship?
“Do you want to be exclusive with me in this relationship?” directly addresses exclusivity. It’s a clear way to establish commitment.
Example:
Person 1: I really care about you. Do you want to be exclusive with me in this relationship?
Person 2: Yes, I do. I’m ready to be exclusive with you.
This question helps set clear boundaries and expectations.
24. How would you define our relationship in terms of commitment?
“How would you define our relationship in terms of commitment?” seeks to understand your partner’s view on commitment. It’s a way to align your understanding.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking about us. How would you define our relationship in terms of commitment?
Person 2: I see us as committed to each other and our future together.
This question helps ensure you’re both equally committed to the relationship.
25. Are we in a relationship together now?
“Are we in a relationship together now?” is a direct question that seeks confirmation. It helps clear up any confusion about your status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, are we in a relationship together now?
Person 2: Yes, we are. I consider us to be in a relationship.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
26. What does this relationship mean to you in terms of commitment?
“What does this relationship mean to you in terms of commitment?” seeks to understand the depth of your partner’s commitment. It’s a way to gauge their seriousness.
Example:
Person 1: I want to understand, what does this relationship mean to you in terms of commitment?
Person 2: It means a lot to me. I’m fully committed to us and our future.
This question helps ensure you’re both equally invested in the relationship.
27. Do you see me as your partner moving forward?
“Do you see me as your partner moving forward?” addresses future intentions. It seeks confirmation of your partner’s vision for the relationship.
Example:
Person 1: I care about you a lot. Do you see me as your partner moving forward?
Person 2: Yes, I do. I want us to be partners in every sense.
This question helps solidify your understanding of your future together.
28. How serious are you about us as a couple?
“How serious are you about us as a couple?” seeks to understand your partner’s level of commitment. It’s a way to gauge their seriousness.
Example:
Person 1: I’m very serious about us. How serious are you about us as a couple?
Person 2: I’m equally serious. I want us to have a strong and lasting relationship.
This question helps ensure you’re both equally committed to the relationship.
29. Are we just dating or something more serious?
“Are we just dating or something more serious?” seeks to understand the level of commitment. It’s a way to clarify your relationship status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, are we just dating or something more serious?
Person 2: I see us as something more serious. I want a committed relationship.
This question helps define your relationship status and set expectations.
30. What do you call what we have together right now?
“What do you call what we have together right now?” is a straightforward way to seek clarity. It helps understand your partner’s perspective.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking, what do you call what we have together right now?
Person 2: I call it a relationship. I think we’re definitely more than just dating.
This approach helps align your understanding of the relationship.
31. Are we boyfriend and girlfriend in your eyes?
“Are we boyfriend and girlfriend in your eyes?” is a direct question that seeks a clear label. It helps confirm your relationship status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, are we boyfriend and girlfriend in your eyes?
Person 2: Yes, we are. I consider you my boyfriend/girlfriend.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
32. How do you see our relationship developing in the future?
“How do you see our relationship developing in the future?” is a forward-looking question. It helps understand your partner’s vision for the future.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking about us. How do you see our relationship developing in the future?
Person 2: I see us growing closer and possibly moving in together.
This question helps you both envision the future and plan accordingly.
33. Do you think we’re in a committed relationship now?
“Do you think we’re in a committed relationship now?” is a direct question that seeks confirmation. It helps clear up any confusion about your status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, do you think we’re in a committed relationship now?
Person 2: Yes, I do. We’re definitely in a committed relationship.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
34. How do you feel about making our relationship official?
“How do you feel about making our relationship official?” seeks to understand your partner’s readiness to define the relationship. It’s a way to discuss taking the next step.
Example:
Person 1: I think we’re ready. How do you feel about making our relationship official?
Person 2: I agree. I think it’s time we made it official.
This question helps move your relationship towards official status.
35. Do you want to take our relationship to the next level?
“Do you want to take our relationship to the next level?” addresses future intentions. It seeks confirmation of your partner’s vision for the relationship.
Example:
Person 1: I care about you a lot. Do you want to take our relationship to the next level?
Person 2: Yes, I do. I think we’re ready for the next step.
This question helps solidify your understanding of your future together.
36. Are we in a serious relationship together now?
“Are we in a serious relationship together now?” is a direct question that seeks confirmation. It helps clear up any confusion about your status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, are we in a serious relationship together now?
Person 2: Yes, we are. I consider us to be in a serious relationship.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
37. How do you feel about calling me your partner in this relationship?
“How do you feel about calling me your partner in this relationship?” seeks to understand your partner’s readiness to define the relationship. It’s a way to discuss taking the next step.
Example:
Person 1: I think we’re ready. How do you feel about calling me your partner in this relationship?
Person 2: I agree. I think it’s time we made it official.
This question helps move your relationship towards official status.
38. Do you want to define what we have together in our relationship?
“Do you want to define what we have together in our relationship?” is a straightforward way to seek clarity. It helps understand your partner’s perspective.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking, do you want to define what we have together in our relationship?
Person 2: Yes, I do. I think we’re ready to put a label on it.
This approach helps align your understanding of the relationship.
39. Are you ready to label our relationship and make it official?
“Are you ready to label our relationship and make it official?” seeks to understand your partner’s readiness to define the relationship. It’s a way to discuss taking the next step.
Example:
Person 1: I think we’re ready. Are you ready to label our relationship and make it official?
Person 2: I agree. I think it’s time we made it official.
This question helps move your relationship towards official status.
40. How do you perceive our relationship right now?
“How do you perceive our relationship right now?” invites your partner to share their perspective. It’s a way to understand their view of your relationship.
Example:
Person 1: I value your opinion. How do you perceive our relationship right now?
Person 2: I think we have something special. I see us as a committed couple.
This approach encourages open dialogue and mutual understanding.
41. Are we in a monogamous relationship now?
“Are we in a monogamous relationship now?” is a direct question that seeks confirmation. It helps clear up any confusion about your status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, are we in a monogamous relationship now?
Person 2: Yes, we are. I’m only seeing you.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
42. What’s your idea of what we are together right now?
“What’s your idea of what we are together right now?” is an open-ended question that invites your partner to share their view. It’s a way to understand their perspective.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been thinking, what’s your idea of what we are together right now?
Person 2: I see us as a couple who’s building something meaningful together.
This approach helps align your understanding of the relationship.
43. Do you consider us to be a serious couple now?
“Do you consider us to be a serious couple now?” is a direct question that seeks confirmation. It helps clear up any confusion about your status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, do you consider us to be a serious couple now?
Person 2: Yes, I do. We’re definitely a serious couple.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
44. Are we in an exclusive relationship together now?
“Are we in an exclusive relationship together now?” is a direct question that seeks confirmation. It helps clear up any confusion about your status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, are we in an exclusive relationship together now?
Person 2: Yes, we are. I’m only seeing you.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
45. How committed do you feel towards me in this relationship?
“How committed do you feel towards me in this relationship?” seeks to understand your partner’s level of commitment. It’s a way to gauge their seriousness.
Example:
Person 1: I’m fully committed to us. How committed do you feel towards me in this relationship?
Person 2: I’m very committed. I want us to have a strong and lasting relationship.
This question helps ensure you’re both equally invested in the relationship.
46. Are you ready to be in a relationship with me now?

“Are you ready to be in a relationship with me now?” is a direct question that seeks confirmation. It helps clear up any confusion about your status.
Example:
Person 1: I need to know, are you ready to be in a relationship with me now?
Person 2: Yes, I am. I’m ready for us to be in a relationship.
This question provides clear confirmation of your relationship status.
47. What does our relationship mean to you in terms of commitment?
“What does our relationship mean to you in terms of commitment?” seeks to understand the depth of your partner’s commitment. It’s a way to gauge their seriousness.
Example:
Person 1: I want to understand, what does our relationship mean to you in terms of commitment?
Person 2: It means a lot to me. I’m fully committed to us and our future.
This question helps ensure you’re both equally invested in the relationship.
48. How do you view us together in this relationship?
“How do you view us together in this relationship?” invites your partner to share their perspective. It’s a way to understand their view of your relationship.
Example:
Person 1: I cherish our connection. How do you view us together in this relationship?
Person 2: I feel the same way. I think we have a strong and growing relationship.
This question fosters open communication and mutual appreciation.
49. Do you see me as more than just a friend in our relationship?
“Do you see me as more than just a friend in our relationship?” is a straightforward way to clarify your relationship status. It helps determine if your partner sees you as more than a friend.
Example:
Person 1: I’ve been wondering, do you see me as more than just a friend in our relationship?
Person 2: Absolutely, I see us as much more than friends. We’re definitely in a relationship.
This question helps clear up any confusion about your relationship status.
50. What’s your perspective on our relationship together now?
“What’s your perspective on our relationship together now?” invites your partner to share their view. It’s a way to understand their perspective.
Example:
Person 1: I value your opinion. What’s your perspective on our relationship together now?
Person 2: I think we have something special. I see us as a committed couple.
This approach encourages open dialogue and mutual understanding.
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FAQs
1. How can I ask “What are we?” without sounding too direct?
If you want to ease into the conversation without sounding too forward, try saying something like, “I really value what we have, and I just want to make sure we’re on the same page.” This opens up the discussion in a way that feels natural and less intense.
2. Is there a right time to ask “What are we?”
Yes, timing is important. Choose a moment when you’re both relaxed and in a private setting, free from distractions. It’s best to ask when you’re feeling emotionally connected, not during moments of tension or stress.
3. What’s a casual way to ask “What are we?” without pressure?
A casual approach could be something like, “I’ve been thinking about us and wanted to get your thoughts on where we’re at.” This keeps the tone light while still addressing the important topic of your relationship status.
4. How do I ask “What are we?” if I’m unsure of how the other person feels?
If you’re uncertain about how the other person feels, frame your question with empathy and openness. “I really care about you, and I just want to understand how you see our relationship.” This gives the other person the space to share their feelings without feeling cornered.
5. Can I ask “What are we?” in a way that encourages a deeper conversation?
Absolutely! Instead of just asking the question, you can say, “I really enjoy spending time with you and want to make sure we’re heading in the same direction. How do you feel about where we are?” This invites a more meaningful conversation and shows you’re invested in the relationship’s future.
6. How do I ask “What are we?” if I’m afraid of the answer?
It’s natural to feel nervous, but honesty is key. You might say, “I know this is a big question, but I think it’s important for us to discuss where we stand. I’m open to hearing your thoughts, no matter what.” This shows you’re ready for whatever response comes and opens the door to an honest conversation.
Conclusion
Defining a relationship requires open communication and mutual understanding. If you’re wondering how to ask ‘What are we?’, these 50 ways to ask someone this important question can help you approach the conversation with confidence and clarity.
Each question is designed to help you understand your partner’s perspective, align your goals, and ensure that you’re both on the same page.
Remember, the key to a successful relationship is honest communication, so don’t be afraid to ask the important questions.
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